He didn’t even tell me until a couple of weeks after we were legally married. And when he did, he mentioned it so casually, as if it were something trivial.
We were sitting together one evening and chatting and watching the odd video online. I don’t remember how the conversation got around to Britney Spears (can anyone ever remember how conversations get around to Britney Spears?), but it did. It was then that he dropped the bomb.
“I took a picture of her from the library when I was younger.”
After further interrogation, I discovered he tore a picture of her out of a magazine at his local library and stole it to take home with him when he was in high school. The nerve of that guy…
My questions of his motives for doing it in the first place, what he did with the picture later, and whether or not he feels any remorse for his crime were deflected with the ease of a seasoned felon. Instead, he pointed out that he could remember she was wearing pink pants and was performing.
So now I am an accessory to this heinous crime, aiding and abetting a fugitive from the law. We may have to go on the lam, which is really hard for me to do here, since I sort of stand out everywhere I go. Maybe if I turn him in, I can cut a plea deal…
(Note: Mom, please relax. While it is true that he took the picture, I’m pretty confident that no one is going to hunt us down for it, even here in China.)
(Note 2: As I was scheduling this post and adding the pictures, my husband looked over my shoulder and laughed about this story again. He added, “Maybe that’s one reason I ended up with a foreigner for a wife!“)
(Note 3: He also added, “By the way, that isn’t the right picture.”)